The Great Roxhythe · Book IV · Chapter 4 5 (2/2)

“Did you come here to quarrel with me?” asked Roxhythe. “Sit down, and talk of something else.”

“I came to implore you to help in the cause of right! I see I might as well talk to a stone!”

“My good child, you excite yourself over nothing.”

“Was it nothing that Father Coleman was murdered? That good man!”

“It was necessary. The King deplored it, but the people would have it.”

“I suppose you advocated it?” said Christopher bitterly.

“Certainly. I thought you knew that nothing counts with me save His Majesty’s safety and peace?”

“I⁠—I cannot answer you, sir. Oh⁠—oh, heaven, how I wish that I had never set eyes on you!”

Roxhythe stretched out his hand.

“Chris, dear boy, you are demented. Calm yourself.”

Christopher ignored his hand.

“Then ’tis you have driven me so! You did your best to break my heart⁠—and now you reveal yourself to me⁠—callous, ruthless! It⁠—hurts damnably, my lord.”

Roxhythe turned away. He said nothing.

“I⁠—I can’t rest! I⁠—oh, there’s no truth anywhere! no honour! I thought Russell and Worth were irreproachable; I thought Shaftesbury above suspicion! I was wrong, wrong, wrong! I’ve done with Englishmen! Each works for his own ends and cares not what means he employs to obtain them. Even you, my lord!”

“I suppose I should be grateful for the ‘even,’ ” said Roxhythe wearily.

Christopher went quickly to his side.

“Ah, no, sir! I⁠—didn’t mean it! I am distraught⁠—I⁠—never meant to say those things⁠—to you. Forgive me!”

Roxhythe laid a hand on his shoulder.

“Chris, you are distraught because you are rudderless. Come back to me!”

“No⁠—no! I cannot! Less than ever now. I⁠—I think I shall go out of my mind soon!”

“Chris, you were happy with me. Come back!”

“Ah, so happy! It could never be the same again. I must go⁠—right away, where I shall not see you.”

“Even though I beg you to stay?”

“Yes⁠—even then, my lord. Don’t try to persuade me! It is hard enough as it is.”

“So you’ll go away? Where?”

“Holland, sir. To join my brother, I think.”

“Orange,” said Roxhythe quietly. “That will be the end, Chris.”

“Yes, sir⁠—the⁠—end.”

“And all in search of⁠—what?”

“In search of honesty and truth. I will not sacrifice my honour for love of man.”

“So instead you’ll sacrifice your happiness for that vague thing called patriotism?”

“I’ll find happiness in my patriotism!”

“You are like to be disappointed,” said Roxhythe.