Giant’s Bread · Book II · III · Chapter 2 3 6

VI

May week was over. Vernon was sitting at a table writing.

Dear Uncle Sydney:

I’ve thought over your offer, and I’d like to come into Bent’s if you still want me. I’m afraid I shall be rather useless, but I will try all I know. I still think it’s most awfully good of you.

He paused. Sebastian was walking up and down restlessly. His pacing disturbed Vernon.

“For goodness’ sake, sit down,” he said irritably. “What’s the matter with you?”

“Nothing.”

Sebastian sat down with unusual mildness. He filled and lighted a pipe. From behind a sheltering haze of smoke, he spoke.

“I say, Vernon. I asked Joe to marry me that last night. She turned me down.”

“Oh! rough luck,” said Vernon, trying to bring his mind back and be sympathetic. “Perhaps she’ll change her mind,” he said vaguely. “They say girls do.”

“It’s this damned money,” said Sebastian angrily.

“What damned money?”

“Mine. Joe always said she would marry me when we were kids together. She likes me⁠—I’m sure she does. And now⁠—everything I say or do always seems to be wrong. If I were only persecuted, or looked down on, or socially undesirable, I believe she’d marry me like a shot. But she’s always got to be on the losing side. It’s a ripping quality in a way, but you can carry it to a pitch where it’s damned illogical. Joe is illogical.”

“Hm,” said Vernon vaguely.

He was selfishly intent on his own affairs. It seemed to him curious that Sebastian should be so keen on marrying Joe. There were lots of other girls who would suit him just as well. He reread his letter and added another sentence:

I will work like a nigger.