Short Plays · The Glimpse of Reality (2/2) (2/2) (1/3)
The Angelus rings. The Friar prays and crosses himself. A girl ferries a boat to the shore and comes up the bank to the cross.
The Girl Father: were you sent here by a boy from⁠—
The Friar In a high, piping, but clear voice. I’m a very old man. Oh, very old. Old enough to be your great grandfather, my daughter. Oh, very very old.
The Girl But were you sent here by a boy from⁠—
The Friar Oh yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Quite a boy, he was. Very young. And I’m very old. Oh, very very old, dear daughter.
The Girl Are you a holy man?
The Friar Ecstatically. Oh, very holy. Very, very, very, very holy.
The Girl But have you your wits still about you, father? Can you absolve me from a great sin?
The Friar Oh yes, yes, yes. A very great sin. I’m very old; but I’ve my wits about me. I’m one hundred and thirteen years old, by the grace of Our Lady; but I still remember all my Latin; and I can bind and loose; and I’m very very wise; for I’m old and have left far behind me the world, the flesh, and the devil. You see I am blind, daughter; but when a boy told me that there was a duty for me to do here, I came without a guide, straight to this spot, led by St. Barbara. She led me to this stone, daughter. It’s a comfortable stone to me: she has blessed it for me.
The Girl It’s a cross, father.
The Friar Piping rapturously. Oh blessed, blessed, ever blessed be my holy patroness for leading me to this sacred spot. Is there any building near this, daughter? The boy mentioned an inn.
The Girl There is an inn, father, not twenty yards away. It’s kept by my father, Squarcio.
The Friar And is there a barn where a very very old man may sleep and have a handful of peas for his supper?
The Girl There is bed and board both for holy men who will take the guilt of our sins from us. Swear to me on the cross that you are a very holy man.
The Friar I’ll do better than that, daughter. I’ll prove my holiness to you by a miracle.
The Girl A miracle!
The Friar A most miraculous miracle. A wonderful miracle! When I was only eighteen years of age I was already famous for my devoutness. When the hand of the blessed Saint Barbara, which was chopped off in the days when the church was persecuted, was found at Viterbo, I was selected by the Pope himself to carry it to Rome for that blessed lady’s festival there; and since that my hand has never grown old. It remains young and warm and plump whilst the rest of my body is withered almost to dust, and my voice is cracked and become the whistling you now hear.
The Girl Is that true? Let me see. He takes her hand in his. She kneels and kisses it fervently. Oh, it’s true. You are a saint. Heaven has sent you in answer to my prayer.
The Friar As soft as your neck, is it not? He caresses her neck.
The Girl It thrills me: it is wonderful.
The Friar It thrills me also, daughter. That, too, is a miracle at my age.
The Girl Father⁠—
The Friar Come closer, daughter. I’m very very old and very very very deaf: you must speak quite close to my ear if you speak low. She kneels with her breast against his arm and her chin on his shoulder. Good. Good. That’s better. Oh, I’m very very old.
The Girl Father: I am about to commit a deadly sin.
The Friar Do, my daughter. Do, do, do, do, do.
The Girl Discouraged. Oh, you do not hear what I say.
The Friar Not hear! Then come closer, daughter. Oh, much, much closer. Put your arm round my shoulders, and speak in my ear. Do not be ashamed, my daughter: I’m only a sack of old bones. You can hear them rattle. He shakes his shoulders and makes the beads of his rosary rattle at the same time. Listen to the old man’s bones rattling. Oh, take the old old man to heaven, Blessed Barbara.
The Girl Your wits are wandering. Listen to me. Are you listening?
The Friar Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes. Remember: whether I hear or not, I can absolve. All the better for you perhaps if I do not hear the worst. He! He! He! Well well. When my wits wander, squeeze my young hand; and the blessed Barbara will restore my faculties. She squeezes his hand vigorously. That’s right. Tha‑a‑a‑a‑ats right. Now I remember what I am and who you are. Proceed, my child.
The Girl Father, I am to be married this year to a young fisherman.
The Friar The devil you are, my dear.
The Girl Squeezing his hand. Oh listen, listen; you are wandering again.
The Friar That’s right: hold my hand tightly. I understand, I understand. This young fisherman is neither very beautiful nor very brave; but he is honest and devoted to you; and there is something about him different to all the other young men.
The Girl You know him, then!
The Friar No no no no no. I’m too old to remember people. But Saint Barbara tells me everything.
The Girl Then you know why we can’t marry yet.
The Friar He is too poor. His mother will not let him unless his bride has a dowry⁠—
The Girl Interrupting him impetuously. Yes, yes: oh blessed be Saint Barbara for sending you to me! Thirty crowns⁠—thirty crowns from a poor girl like me: it is wicked⁠—monstrous. I must sin to earn it.
The Friar That will not be your sin, but his mother’s.
The Girl Oh, that is true: I never thought of that. But will she suffer for it?
The Friar Thousands of years in purgatory for it, my daughter. The worse the sin, the longer she will suffer. So let her have it as hot as possible. The Girl recoils. Do not let go my hand: I’m wandering. She squeezes his hand. That’s right, darling. Sin is a very wicked thing, my daughter. Even a mother-in-law’s sin is very expensive; for your husband would stint you to pay for masses for her soul.
The Girl That is true. You are very wise, father.
The Friar Let it be a venial sin: an amiable sin. What sin were you thinking of, for instance?
The Girl There is a young Count Ferruccio the Friar starts at the name, son of the tyrant of Parma⁠—
The Friar An excellent young man, daughter. You could not sin with a more excellent young man. But thirty crowns is too much to ask from him. He can’t afford it. He is a beggar: an outcast. He made love to Madonna Brigita, the sister of Cardinal Poldi, a Cardinal eighteen years of age, a nephew of the Holy Father. The Cardinal surprised Ferruccio with his sister; and Ferruccio’s temper got the better of him. He threw that holy young Cardinal out of the window and broke his arm.
The Girl You know everything.
The Friar Saint Barbara, my daughter, Saint Barbara. I know nothing. But where have you seen Ferruccio? Saint Barbara says that he never saw you in his life, and has not thirty crowns in the world.
The Girl Oh, why does not Saint Barbara tell you that I am an honest girl who would not sell herself for a thousand crowns.
The Friar Do not give way to pride, daughter. Pride is one of the seven deadly sins.
The Girl I know that, father; and believe me, I’m humble and good. I swear to you by Our Lady that it is not Ferruccio’s love that I must take, but his life. The Friar, startled, turns powerfully on her. Do not be angry, dear father: do not cast me off. What is a poor girl to do? We are very poor, my father and I. And I am not to kill him. I am only to decoy him here; for he is a devil for women; and once he is in the inn, my father will do the rest.
The Friar In a rich baritone voice. Will he, by thunder and lightning and the flood and all the saints, will he? He flings off his gown and beard, revealing himself as a handsome youth, a nobleman by his dress, as he springs up and rushes to the door of the inn, which he batters with a stone. Ho there, Squarcio, rascal, assassin, son of a pig: come out that I may break every bone in your carcass.
The Girl You are a young man!
The Friar Another miracle of Saint Barbara. Kicking the door. Come out, whelp: come out, rat. Come out and be killed. Come out and be beaten to a jelly. Come out, dog, swine, animal, mangy hound, lousy⁠—Squarcio comes out, sword in hand. Do you know who I am, dog?
Squarcio Impressed. No, your Excellency.
The Friar I am Ferruccio, Count Ferruccio, the man you are to kill, the man your devil of a daughter is to decoy, the man who is now going to cut you into forty thousand pieces and throw you into the lake.
Squarcio Keep your temper, Signor Count.
Ferruccio I’ll not keep my temper. I’ve an uncontrollable temper. I get blinding splitting headaches if I do not relieve my temper by acts of violence. I’ll relieve it now by pounding you to jelly, assassin that you are.
Squarcio Shrugging his shoulders. As you please, Signor Count. I may as well earn my money now as another time. He handles his sword.
Ferruccio Ass: do you suppose I have trusted myself in this territory without precautions? My father has made a wager with your feudal lord here about me.
Squarcio What wager, may it please your Excellency?
Ferruccio What wager, blockhead! Why, that if I am assassinated, the murderer will not be brought to justice.
Squarcio So that if I kill you⁠—
Ferruccio Your Baron will lose ten crowns unless you are broken on the wheel for it.
Squarcio Only ten crowns, Excellency! Your father does not value your life very highly.
Ferruccio Dolt. Can you not reason? If the sum were larger your Baron would win it by killing me himself and breaking somebody else on the wheel for it: you, most likely. Ten crowns is just enough to make him break you on the wheel if you kill me, but not enough to pay for all the masses that would have to be said for him if the guilt were his.
Squarcio That is very clever, Excellency. Sheathing his sword. You shall not be slain: I will take care of that. If anything happens, it will be an accident.
Ferruccio Body of Bacchus! I forgot that trick. I should have killed you when my blood was hot.
Squarcio Will your Excellency please to step in? My best room and my best cooking are at your Excellency’s disposal.
Ferruccio To the devil with your mangy kennel! You want to tell every traveller that Count Ferruccio slept in your best bed and was eaten by your army of fleas. Take yourself out of my sight when you have told me where the next inn is.
Squarcio I’m sorry to thwart your Excellency; but I have not forgotten your father’s wager; and until you leave this territory I shall stick to you like your shadow.
Ferruccio And why, pray?
Squarcio Someone else might kill your Excellency; and, as you say, my illustrious Baron might break me on the wheel for your father’s ten crowns. I must protect your Excellency, whether your Excellency is willing or not.
Ferruccio If you dare to annoy me, I’ll handle your bones so that there will be nothing left for the hangman to break. Now what do you say?
Squarcio I say that your Excellency overrates your Excellency’s strength. You would have no more chance against me than a grasshopper. Ferruccio makes a demonstration. Oh, I know that your Excellency has been taught by fencers and wrestlers and the like; but I can take all you can give me without turning a hair, and settle the account when you are out of breath. That is why common men are dangerous, your Excellency: they are inured to toil and endurance. Besides, I know all the tricks.
The Girl Do not attempt to quarrel with my father, Count. It must be as he says. It is his profession to kill. What could you do against him? If you want to beat somebody, you must beat me. She goes into the inn.
Squarcio I advise you not to try that, Excellency. She also is very strong.
Ferruccio Then I shall have a headache: that’s all. He throws himself ill-humoredly on a bench at the table outside the inn. Giulia returns with a tablecloth and begins preparing the table for a meal.
Squarcio A good supper, Excellency, will prevent that. And Giulia will sing for you.
Ferruccio Not while there’s a broomstick in the house to break her ugly head with. Do you suppose I’m going to listen to the howling of a she-wolf who wanted me to absolve her for getting me killed?
Squarcio The poor must live as well as the rich, sir. Giulia is a good girl. He goes into the inn.
Ferruccio Shouting after him. Must the rich die that the poor may live?
Giulia The poor often die that the rich may live.
Ferruccio What an honor for them! But it would have been no honor for me to die merely that you might marry your clod of a fisherman.
Giulia You are spiteful, Signor.
Ferruccio I am no troubadour, Giuliaccia, if that is what you mean.
Giulia How did you know about my Sandro and his mother? How were you so wise when you pretended to be an old friar? you that are so childish now that you are yourself?
Ferruccio I take it that either Saint Barbara inspired me, or else that you are a great fool.
Giulia Saint Barbara will surely punish you for that wicked lie you told about her hand.
Ferruccio The hand that thrilled you?
Giulia That was blasphemy. You should not have done it. You made me feel as if I had had a taste of heaven; and then you poisoned it in my heart as a taste of hell. That was wicked and cruel. You nobles are cruel.
Ferruccio Well! do you expect us to nurse your babies for you? Our work is to rule and to fight. Ruling is nothing but inflicting cruelties on wrongdoers: fighting is nothing but being cruel to one’s enemies. You poor people leave us all the cruel work, and then wonder that we are cruel. Where would you be if we left it undone? Outside the life I lead all to myself⁠—the life of thought and poetry⁠—I know only two pleasures: cruelty and lust. I desire revenge: I desire women. And both of them disappoint me when I get them.
Giulia It would have been a good deed to kill you, I think.
Ferruccio Killing is always sport, my Giuliaccia.
Sandro’s Voice On the lake. Giulietta! Giulietta!
Ferruccio Calling to him. Stop that noise. Your Giulietta is here with a young nobleman. Come up and amuse him. To Giulietta. What will you give me if I tempt him to defy his mother and marry you without a dowry?
Giulia You are tempting me. A poor girl can give no more than she has. I should think you were a devil if you were not a noble, which is worse. She goes out to meet Sandro.
Ferruccio Calling after her. The devil does evil for pure love of it: he does not ask a price: he offers it. Squarcio returns. Prepare supper for four, bandit.
Squarcio Is your appetite so great in this heat, Signor?
Ferruccio There will be four to supper. You, I, your daughter, and Sandro. Do not stint yourselves: I pay for all. Go and prepare more food.
Squarcio Your order is already obeyed, Excellency.
Ferruccio How?
Squarcio I prepared for four, having you here to pay. The only difference your graciousness makes is that we shall have the honor to eat with you instead of after you.
Ferruccio Dog of a bandit: you should have been born a nobleman.
Squarcio I was born noble, Signor; but as we had no money to maintain our pretensions, I dropped them. He goes back into the inn.
Giulia* returns with Sandro*.
Giulia This is the lad, Excellency. Sandro: this is his lordship Count Ferruccio.
Sandro At your lordship’s service.
Ferruccio Sit down, Sandro. You, Giulia, and Squarcio are my guests. They sit.
Giulia I’ve told Sandro everything, Excellency.
Ferruccio And what does Sandro say? Squarcio returns with a tray.